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Through the Hourglass

by Pyramids

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1.
I'm a long way from home, and every step closer feels less tangible, feels a lifetime further away. I've written myself into empty hope, plotted my own failure, and condemned the past to contend with my presence. Lost in obsession, the existence of which strangles reality from every notion of time or location, my mind's resigned to wander with familiar strides, and content to march with delirious clarity down a destructive warpath it knows I'd rather avoid. But I can't look away. This machine shares my name. Each ember that falls from its remains, falls from me, is me, is my brush with perfection, is the future I wish not to attain and the past I wish not to have broken. I've traded lost in the current for trapped in the stagnant. But I can't look back. My eyes have no vessel to take me.
2.
Clockwork 05:58
Death, prolonged by a return to infancy, has more patience than I. Reborn into a caustic world with a name that inspires nothing, pulling meaning from pieces, consumed by repetition and outmaneuvered by my consciousness, my life isn't a trial; it's an eternity. But I'm just a child. All I have is time. And time will save me, through this machine. Time will enslave me through this machine. Its movement is mine. And as we fall gracefully upward through the hourglass, no comforting melody invites us. How long can a voyage take in a vacuum without time?
3.
the Crow 00:56
4.
Stasis 04:32
A vessel to reconstruct fate, in my own hands awaits, but I cannot move. Reflections in glass still fail me, and my body is an empty vow. I'm forced into instinct, buried beneath uncertainty as if going forward without choice. But is it forward? It starts with time, and if I've lost myself, time is all I have to reclaim my thoughts. Moments in passing, but lifetimes in the making, my journey eclipses distance, and here I am, or now I am, so far from home but so much closer than I've ever known. I'm walking forward, but a straight arrow can spend a lifetime revolving in a futile clock. And freedom expects me even in the past. A thousand years of traveling couldn't find me the map I'd need to escape from this maze. I have no footprints to follow and no warm hands to hold for comfort. But I face myself and endless nightmares made real, and make my move to end the questions. Lo and behold, there are no mistakes in time.
5.
Entropic 01:43
Lost in confrontation, in panic, I find myself, and in this struggle I see what was taken from me. There's no mistaking the figure before me, wearing the clothes I was found in, wearing the life I abandoned. I can't make sense of my questions, so I run. I'm staring at my eyes and all I see is fear on both sides of the mirror, so I panic. But then it happens, and I watch the connection, find my answers in violence, witness my own fall from grace. And the experience graces me with no better understanding. Years of hoping for progress, but I've reduced myself to nothing. Lying lifelessly as I'll awake, the only proof I exist has now become a map to safe refuge.
6.
the Phoenix 02:56
Echoes can't be experienced, only witnessed second-hand. Each keystroke reminds me, but it doesn't revive me.
7.
The present no longer holds any meaning to me. Now and then are the same cocoon, as alien as they are smothering, as harmonious as parasitic, and buried beneath ten thousand questions and doubts. I'm naive to believe in introspection. My true thoughts are out of reach, and the person beneath my skin is as out of harmony with the personal as with the external. History repeats a measure. Identity reveals a foreign motion. With a finger for each key, an elliptical melody echoes its past mistakes, selfish and consumed. Conducting fear with repeating phrases, I'm defined by its movement and I anticipate its end without thought. I built this house from the ground up and every brick seems misplaced, every picture seems mistaken. Every lonely reminder that I have company only in being a stranger to my own existence echoes backward on the wings of the most familiar trait I have: my obsession. And my most familiar traitor has wasted too many tears on a life with no meaning.
8.
Remember. The inevitable isn't out of my hands. Experience lends me the tools I remember, but forsakes me the difference. The closer that gap becomes, the less I feel I owe, so I remove myself from fate as the current pulls closer. Forget. Salvation comes with the plunge through every forgotten memory, erased before written, reversed through the hourglass for the mountain at its bottom. Time ends with the final grain of sand, and with its falling I sever the past and embrace the unknown. My journey ends, in my hands alone, as I recognize them for the first time.

credits

released December 4, 2007

Sean Connolly, Dave Finzimer, Benn Roe

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Pyramids Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Pyramids was a three-piece Philadelphian hardcore band from 2005 to 2012. We had several different line-ups, but we were always loud.

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